We have this old shopping cart that squeaks loudly with every push and turn, SQUEEEEK, WRRREEEEK, WEEEEK. Some customers mind it, many ask if they can switch for another shopping cart because they feel embarrassed pushing something that makes such obnoxious sounds. Even in the break room at the back of the store and I can hear it coming down the aisle.

About once a year we get a cart inspection and somehow it passes. I know this because I tagged the cart myself with the happy face sticker I give to the kids. Shopping carts are about $200 a piece so corporate wants to save whatever dime they could. I tried spraying WD40 on the wheels, pressure washing, and tightening the wheel. I did everything but replace the wheels cause well you can’t really find a spare shopping cart wheel.

Shift after shift, I hear that same sound SQUEEEEK, WRRREEEEK, WEEEEK. So agonizing, so embarrassing, I’m waiting for someone else in management to get rid of the damn thing but there’s obviously no effort because I still hear that wretched sound.

It was time, I plotted with the courtesy clerks, checkers, and everyone else not a part of upper management. We’re going to get rid of this thing. I pushed that nasty shopping cart to the side of the store where there’s a gated locked fence. Perfect, I thought. That nasty thing is locked away and no one goes over there, except the trash man. I walked back into the store feeling triumphant and relieved. I nod at my fellow grocery clerks; the job was done, they smile with appreciation.

The Next Day

SQUEEEEK, WRRREEEEK, WEEEEK

What the F*@%! Who brought it back in!!!!!! The checkers started calling the shopping cart, “Christine,” from the Stephen King horror novel “Christine”, it tells the story of a possessed car named “Christine” that kills people. “Christine” is also an indestructible automobile; she gets put on fire, hits cars going full speed, goes through buildings and even bulldozed but she always finds a way to come back to life.

Dude, we can’t fix it and we can’t get rid of it, it’s the Christine of shopping carts!

One of the courtesy clerks had a great idea, “We can give Christine to one of the bottle people, so they can push their cans around.”

Oh man, why didn’t we think of that before! We left Christine at the end of the parking lot for a victim to take her home. We didn’t hear from Christine all day and she was no longer in the parking lot, looks like someone took the bait. YEAAAAHHHH!!

A Few Days Later

SQUEEEEK, WRRREEEEK, WEEEEK

CHRISTINE’S BACK!!!!!

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